The Hills Shows How to Shotgun Your Wedding
This week, Spencer lures Heidi into a scary-sounding marriage, and Whitney finally — finally — leaves for New York.
Posted 12/09/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
Whitney Vacantly Begins Her Move From The Hills
Plus: Spencer's a jerk, Stephanie's clueless, and Lauren's overemotional. You know, your typical episode.
Posted 12/02/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
‘The Hills’ Learns About Trust and We Learn About Nana
Audrina and Lauren pretend to patch things up, and we meet the woman indirectly responsible for Spencer and Stephanie's existence.
Posted 11/25/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
Audrina Freaks, Lauren Cries, and ‘The Hills’ Delivers
After a lackluster season, 'The Hills' delivers a screechy, mascara-ruining episode. Thank God.
Posted 11/17/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
‘The Hills’ to Return for Fifth Season
And Lauren Conrad to remain inexplicably, massively famous. Sigh.
Posted 11/11/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
‘The Hills’ Gives Us the Male-Model Action We Deserve
This week's episode brings us back to sweet little Whitney — who's picking up dudes in crappy NYC bars.
Posted 10/07/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
‘The Hills’ Needs a Peace Accord
In this week's episode, Heidi makes an earnest plea for reconciliation with Lauren. You can imagine how that went over.
Posted 09/23/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
Lauren Ditches ‘The Hills’ — and We Are Entertained!
L.C. is vacationing in Italy, which means the supporting characters are running the show this week. And? It's actually good.
Posted 09/16/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
‘The Hills’ Knows No Economic Drama
Another week, another head trip into the un-reality of Lauren Conrad's world.
Posted 09/09/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
‘Hills’ Doubleheader: Audrina and Lauren Finally Talk, OMG.
In this week's second episode, the girls get the mascara all over the place. Obviously.
Posted 09/09/08 in The Cut
Head for the Hills
A Double Dose of ‘The Hills’
MTV blessed us twice as much this week, especially in giving us a blowout "let's totally implode in Vegas" episode.
Posted 09/02/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
‘The Hills’ Gets Its Very Own Yenta
In an episode much improved from last week's snoozer, Whitney goes to New York and Kelly Cutrone multitasks like a power bitch.
Posted 08/26/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
Drama on ‘The Hills’ Strangely Akin to That of Middle East
Episode two of the latest season was a waste, save for some current-events analysis from the one and only Spencer Pratt.
Posted 08/19/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
When You’re in ‘The Hills,’ You'll Never Be Friends
The new season of 'The Hills' premiered last night, and we could finally breathe for the first time.
Posted 07/24/08 in The Cut
New York Fugging City
Forecasting ‘The Hills’: A Whole Season in a Single Trailer
MTV has released a preview for season four, and we can pretty much tell you exactly how this whole sloppy thing is going to play out.
Posted 06/12/08 in The Cut
New York Fugging City
The Teen Idol Is Dead, Long Live the (Reality-TV) Teen Idol
Remember when teen idols had actual talent? Yeah, those were the days before Nicole Richie, Speidi, and reality television ruined it all.
Posted 05/13/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
‘The Hills’ Season Finale: Speidi, at Last
It's the season finale, and this episode boils down to the only things that matter in 'Hills'-ville: Heidi and Spencer, and the Lauren-Lo-Audrina mess.
Posted 05/06/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
‘The Hills’: No Place Like Audrina's Crappy Home
This week in the continuing saga we like to refer to as Shitting on Audrina’s Head, we open with Heidi (sleeveless and wearing a scarf, as is the inexplicable L.A. style) and her fake boss Brent Bolthouse chatting in his office.
Posted 04/22/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
Everyone Fights on ‘The Hills,’ But Justin Bobby's Back
This week, Lauren and Lo turn on poor Audrina, which is kind of like kicking a kid in a wheelchair. At least she's got her skeevy boy toy to comfort her!
Posted 04/15/08 in The Cut
Cult of Personality
Spencer and Heidi Scream All Over ‘The Hills’
We welcome you back to a Monday-evening episode of 'The Hills,' subtly titled "Girls Night Out." It's only one episode tonight, folks, and let us say: Amen.
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